Relationships & Attachment

Relationship difficulties can be painful precisely because they touch the parts of us that most want connection, safety and recognition.

You may notice that you become very preoccupied with a relationship, fear being left, find yourself drawn towards people who cannot fully meet you, or lose sight of your own needs when somebody else is distressed. You may also find closeness difficult even when you want it.

I work with the idea that our ways of relating develop in context. What once helped you stay connected, protected or accepted can later become a pattern that is hard to shift.

Therapy gives us a relationship in which these patterns can be thought about carefully. We can explore what happens around closeness, conflict, boundaries, separation, rejection and repair, including what becomes visible in the therapeutic relationship itself.

This can be especially important when you already understand the pattern intellectually and still find that the emotional pull of it remains powerful.

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